😮 Meet Your New Squishy Human… Sort Of

Ever wish you could squish someone’s face without consequences? Now you can!
Introducing the Emotionally Unavailable Human Face Toy – equal parts stress ball, finger gym, and “what the heck is that?” conversation starter.

👃 Weirdly Human, Delightfully Squishable
This little face is designed for fidgeters, thinkers, and stress-ball squish connoisseurs.
Poke it, stretch it, mash it into something unrecognizable — but don’t yank too hard on the nose or lips. It has feelings. Sort of.

🧪 Made from Science Goo (a.k.a. TPR)
Crafted with top-tier TPR material that’s non-toxic, odorless, durable, and just the right amount of creepy. Smells like nothing. Feels like everything.

🧘‍♂️ Stress Relief, But Make It Strange
Had a tough day? Don’t scream into the void — squish this guy’s cheeks instead.
It’s therapeutic, portable, and weirdly adorable. Take it on the go, and squish away your awkward silences or public transit rage.

🎉 Party Trick or Desk Mascot? You Decide.
Perfect for:

• Classrooms (teachers will love this… probably)

• Offices (don’t tell HR)

• Parties, planes, pockets, panic attacks

• Halloween, Secret Santa, or that one friend who collects cursed objects

🧠 It’s Watching You Work
The ultimate desk decoration. Just set it down and let its judgmental stare keep you focused. Or confused. Either works.

Give it as a gift, keep it for yourself, or leave one randomly on someone’s desk and walk away slowly.
Because nothing says “I care” like a squishy disembodied human face.